A One Gallon Bag

Three and a half weeks -- that's how far into this wait we are. If you'd like to know the truth, it seems like a hell of a lot longer than that. During infertility purgatory there is this time called the dreaded "two week wait." All infertiles know this phrase and shudder at the thought. It refers to the window of time that occurs after an embryo transfer until a pregnancy test. Add to that mental stress the physical pain of at least one intramuscular shot of a liquid the consistency of cold syrup into your butt each night, and this wait turned into a party beyond description. I really hated that time. I don't hate this time -- but it certainly has its moments.

I broke down last week. I finally emailed my adoption agency and asked if I should expect any form of communication between now and the travel call. Evidently, I can track through the 49 steps before we can travel OR I can sit back and trust the system is working. With my newfound zen approach on life, I (we) have decided to let the system work (please work, please god...please work.) We were given permission to put together a one gallon ziploc bag worth of objects for our baby boy. Dustin sent this out this morning. Do you know how small a one gallon bag is? I couldn't fit myself into it -- in case you were wondering. Dustin and I had to go through the house and decide what was important enough to send to Jaden, but not so valuable that we would be heartbroken if it were lost (there is no guarantee this package will actually arrive in Korea before we do.) After contemplating this for a few days, here is what we came up with:

• A photo album -- a really ugly one made by this Whoozit company -- but I guess babies like the crinkly paper. We put five pictures in there of Dustin and I. We even put the one in where Dustin said, "that makes me look fat." If you know Dustin, you know why this picture still made the cut. However, the one where I looked half-baked? That one did NOT make it in.
• A disposable camera. We hope that the foster mother who is loving and caring for Jaden is taking pictures of him too. But, that is not a requirement. We are sending a camera in hopes for 24 shots of his 6th and 7th months of life.
• A blanket. We bought it, I washed it, we slept with it to put our smells on it. Now, it is en route to Korea.

This may not seem like much, but the love that is accompanying these items is keeping me up at night. I'm sure the package does more for us than it does for him at this point. At least it is something. Now, I had better get back to not calling the US immigration offices.