Showers

In the past three weeks, Dustin and I have been brought to a state of speechlessness. We had two baby showers thrown for us. One, by our neighbors -- the couples who live in the closest proximity to us in Suburbia-land. The second, by my closest neighbor (both in terms of geography and friendship) and former roommate/card-playing partner and current friend. Both showers left me with a feeling of "is this for us?" and full of love and goodwill. I'm not kidding about this, despite the cheese-factor you may be feeling. My neighbors, friends and relatives have made Dustin and I feel ridiculously loved and supported. I want to share three examples of this.

1. Homemade woodworking

At the couples shower, two of our neighbors made Jaden homemade gifts that go far beyond my talent with glitter and glue.

We love them. The toybox already has two footballs in it.

2. Long Distance

My mother-in-law lives near Atlanta, GA. She works in the field of health care benefits, which we all know is crazy right now because of open enrollment. She took time out of her schedule to fly up here on a Saturday to attend the second shower. It won't surprise you when I tell you she is one of the most generous, caring, selfless people whom I've ever met. It was so exciting having her here to show her Jaden's room, diapers, blankets, etc. I love her lots.

3. Thoughtfulness

My two friends who hostessed the second shower need to open a catering business. Between the cake and the food spread, I felt like I should have paid admission to attend.

The two organized the shower with an Asian theme -- all of the food was so inspired and was nothing short of fantastic. There were fortune cookies and paper lanterns. To top it off, one of the hostesses and her husband gave a gift that still make my eyes water -- a traditional hanbok that Jaden can wear for his first birthday.

I guess I just wanted to take a moment to share some of the highlights of the showers. Everyone who came, all the gifts and notes that were given; they all make me feel more secure and supported while on the precipice of parenthood. So, once again, thank you.

Giving Thanks

Jaden will have three moms in his life. I think a lot about all three of these moms on a daily basis: his first mother, his foster mother and me. I think about these three moms so much. I will meet his foster mother soon. She has taken care of him every day since he was just a tiny, tiny baby. She knows his cries when he is hungry, she took care of him this fall when he was sick, and she is preparing to say good-bye to him in the next few weeks. I want to write her a letter to have translated into Korean. I want to tell her how much peace her love and care has brought to my husband and I during these torturous weeks waiting to meet our son. I want to tell her thank you.

I may or may not ever meet Jaden's first mother -- his birthmother. Her story is one I cannot imagine, but her life will be linked forever to mine. I do not want to trivialize or minimalize her decisions and sacrifices by speculating what may or may not have been. But, I do want to recognize that I think of her daily. She knew Jaden from the beginning, and has given us a son to love for a lifetime. Our gratitude for this is indescribable.

Over the past two weeks, I feel like I have started identifying as a mother. There is no rulebook here -- becoming a mother through adoption. I am overcome with excitement, fear, love, amazement, and awe simultaneously. I'm going to be Jaden's mom. I don't want to let his other two down.

Halfway

Five weeks in and this is what I know:

1. We have received our I-171 form which means Jaden has received a visa from the US government! This seems like a big deal...at least we are treating it as such.

2. A couple of weeks ago we found out that Jaden had been in the hospital with a nasty virus. He is fine now, but it was really hard to find out about this after the fact. The silver lining is that we received updates on his growth.

3. He was 16.88 pounds and 27 inches long at his 6 month appointment.

4. My leave of absence request from my job is being finalized. I won't be returning to school after our winter break.

5. Dustin and I ordered Jaden's diapers this week. BumGenius 3.0. I'm sure I'll be blogging about the cost/benefit of going this route in the future. Regardless, they are cute. Check them out at http://www.cottonbabies.com/.

6. Barack Obama will be our baby's President!

I think that is it for now. We have our first official baby shower this evening. Things are getting more real by the second.